Monday, April 16, 2012

I Wish

Sometimes I wish everything was different.

That everything wasn't so hard all the time.

That more days numbered "good" instead of "crummy".

That I had the power to change things.

That I had the wisdom to know what to change and how.

That I had the faith to believe in something and the courage to follow it.

Anything, really.

For some days, I don't even believe in myself anymore.

I wish I was stronger.

I wish I was kinder.

I wish I was smarter.

I wish I was more patient and loving and understanding of others.

I wish I forgave easily. 

I wish I didn't weigh the bad so heavily and the good so lightly. 

But most of all, I wish I didn't spend so much time wishing these things.

For all the sincerest wishes in the world still don't amount to anything more than wishful thinking.

6 comments:

  1. have faith, marty! sometimes wishes do come true. : )

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  2. I'm sorry, Marty. You're such a good person -- I hope you'll realize that soon. Take care of yourself.

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  3. <3
    We love you for all your faults and shenanigans

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  4. I'm sorry, I just have to say it: "Looks like someone's got a case of the Mondays!" (If you haven't seen it before, the movie Office Space is worth checking out.)

    I am sending long-distance hugs your way. Also, I think I am older enough to confidently say, "It gets better."

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    1. i second the office space recommendation!

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  5. I'm torn between posting the lyrics to Skee-Los' "I Wish" and giving you a hug.

    Momma said there'd be days like this, but she didn't say nearly every single blasted day would be like this for days on end. Consider yourself hugged.

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