Wednesday, June 13, 2012

When It's Too Easy

Yesterday I took a proficiency test for a Court Clerk position with the town of Parker.

But before I tell you all about that, I should make sure you understand that Parker is as far away from where I live as I could possibly get while still managing to fall under the Greater Denver Metro Area label.

Which means it's probably the one job I might actually get as it's incredibly inconvenient to drive to and would demand an almost immediate move, you know, assuming Marty doesn't really want to spend 4 hours a day driving in shitty freeway traffic.

Which brings me to the next point of note: oh my god there was TRAFFIC.

See, my commute to Target clocks in at 35 minutes each way, 30 of which are spent on scenic mountain roads with minimal amounts of other cars.

I am SO not accustomed to using freeways these days. At all. And was kinda freaked out by the congestion. And how there are just sooo many cars. Who are stopping. Why are they stopping?? WHY????

Or you know, what everyone living around Washington DC calls "a normal day".

But after all that, I did indeed make it to the Parker town hall.

Parker is an interesting town. It's all really new, but was built in the style of it being old. Because because it's new, the old looking stuff just looks really fake. I also liked the incidents of full fledged farms being right next to notably large and grandiose new construction houses. I'm kinda sad I didn't get a picture of one, the house was even larger and more castle-styled than most, and right across the street was a farm with cows (although I will put both Iowa and northern NY to shame by not being able to tell from my brief glance whether they were dairy cows or steak cows).

But back to the test....

It was not unlike other pre-screenings I have taken. The typing portion was pretty standard (by which I mean the subject matter I had to type was simultaneously nonsensical and boring), and they only required 35 wpm to pass, which is comically low compared to EVERYONE else. My typing speed has come out as a solid 70+ wpm on several of those tests, despite my hesitation still to claim anything higher than 65wpm, so I'm pretty sure I passed that part regardless.

The math section, although not dissimilar in format, did have notably easier questions than ANY other one I have taken. Like, I kid you not, I (yes ME!!) did every single one quickly in my head, without needing the scrap paper AT ALL.

This may not be impressive to those of you who excel at adding large sums in your head, but it will be to my parents but math has never been my favorite subject, and every time algebra or advanced geometry makes an appearance I start to get all twitchy again and don't even trust myself to do but the simplest addition without checking it twice.

(Did you know my ACT math score in high school was so good I automatically was passed out of the college math requirement at Cornell? I don't know if that means I just got VERY lucky that particular testing day, or whether my math classes in high school actually were as ridiculously overly hard as I sure thought they were.)

But here, let me share some of the questions with you:
  1. Kyla bought something that's regularly $300 when it was 50% off. How much did she pay?
  2. Eric drives East 5 miles, North for 6 miles, and then West for 8 miles. How many total miles did he drive?
  3. Seven men and 3 women went into a building. Three men and 1 woman came out. How many people were still inside?
So what do you all think? Those seem rather like 7th grade level math, yes? Or maybe I'm just waaay smarter than I thought I was. That would be pretty cool, especially considering how I almost failed out of my higher level IB math course my senior year. 

But then, it got even creepier!

The spelling part was unlike other spelling tests I have taken (by which I pretty much just mean it was easy and I think I may have even *gasp* done well on it).

There was a sentence with a blank, and you listened to the audio and typed in the correct word.

But see, that wasn't SPELLING so much as WORDING. Or is it grammar? Reasonable grasp of the English language and how it works??

Like, how you affect the outcome by having effective word selection. And whether you know what weather you want. And how too many there's bring trouble to their new knowledge of what they're sure they already knew.

There was one that gave me a little pause though. I knew the word for the sentence was "incidence" from the singular use of "has" later in the sentence, and not incidents as it sounds exceptionally similar to on the audio as it would have used "have".

(I so smart, I know 7th grade language arts AND math.)

I just wasn't 100% certain of how to spell "incidence"..... but as I'm typing here correctly, without spell check fixing it, I'm hoping I was right on autopilot for the test as well.

Also, I'm pretty sure my tendency to do things like read big books with complex language (and unrelated, but also with involved and complicated plots) and keep a blog totally helped me out substantially on that section in comparison to how I would have preformed had I spent the last two years only watching tv.

I sure do love me some written words when I'm not so sleep deprived I can't focus my eyes enough to actually read words. 

Now for all those who make these typing tests, couldn't you just put in an excerpt from one of the Game of Thrones books instead of the made up nonsense dribble? Pretty please? Or better yet, how about somebody hire me to make typing tests that are both interesting AND requiring all over keyboard usage?? I bet I would be pretty awesome at that. Oh, and could you make a 32 hour work week but still keep a decent salary and benefits package? Yep, that sounds like an excellent plan.

The only other point of note about the day was attire. I wore my very bright short dress again (which happens to look FABULOUS with my pink streaked hair, justsoyaknow). And again, everybody else was in those half yoga/half slack stretchy looking black pants that I passionately don't like.


I think I'll just keep on being a little more me, and a little less concerned about everybody else's opinions.

1 comment:

  1. FORMAL YOGA SLACKS!!!!!!! These are worn by women who don't really want to acknowledge that they are now dressing like a cast member of "Golden Girls."

    Good luck with the job!