Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Eye-balled Ketchup and Other Exciting Target Finds

Remember my most recent post like this, and how I told you I had to split it between two because of how many pictures there were? Well, I totally lied, it's going to be three!

Installment numero dos begins with eye-balled ketchup and mustard bottles. A good friend of mine in high school staunchly maintained that dolls were a little creepy with their eyes. I didn't really understand her. After seeing these, I'm starting to. Also, those mouths........ *shudder*

This was THE lamp that caught my attention when they first set this rotation. It's a metallic balloon dog with a lamp shade head! Or, maybe that's supposed to be a balloon pony, it's kinda hard to tell. Regardless, it is the most bizarre lamp I have ever seen. And I work at Target, where selling bizarre lamps is one of our specialties! It also comes in a very noticeable shade of metallic purple, but ours got broken (yeah, how sad is that) and no-one has actually purchased any of these to create new deliveries coming in.

Ah yes, I do so love that refreshing taste of pepper pants and salty stomach on my eggs early in the morning. Every home should have a set or three.


And speaking of fun at breakfast, I do so love pretending I have a gigantic diamond ring on when I drink my morning coffee. It makes me feel so validated in my existence, knowing that what one should truly strive for in life is just landing that big rock. And you know what they say, the bigger the ring the bigger the catch. Therefore it's not just a statement of commitment, but a status symbol as well. A small ring simply means a less inferior man.

I actually kinda want this. It's a dinosaur pasta scoop. When I first saw it, I had to run around the store being a dinasaur puppet for all my coworkers.

RAWR!




And when I'm making those awesome salt&pepper pant eggs, I can totally use the guitar spatula and then rock it out in between egging.

Or something like that. 

I can also use my Russian stacking doll timer to make sure I don't over-cook those precious guitar scrambled and pants salted eggs. It's almost kid friendly enough to make me think I should use it for something like timing time-outs, or when I give five minute warnings before bedtime. But then I'd have to actually spend exactly five minutes after saying that, instead of however long I want like it is now. A coworker of mine criticized me for that, when I told Kristina "5 more minutes" in the toy department of Target one time, and then said her 5 minutes were up after only three had actually passed. I still say it's one of those parent prerogatives until they can tell time.

This overly cliche cliche brings a high level of meaning to the term "brain freeze". Ha ha. Ha.

Ha.....

I'm a little sad the brain freeze ice cube trays be long gone by Halloween rolls around though, they'd be HUGE sellers that week.

And then we come to more mustaches. I told you, I don't really understand why they're SO STUPIDLY FUNNY in the last post, and nobody has come along to enlighten me yet.

So... they are still a "thing", I still don't understand what that "thing" really is, and they're still really weird to me. But, just in case you really do find it as amusing as the rest of the internets (even if you haven't chosen to enlighten me about why it is so amusing in the first place), Target has your mustache needs covered with this lovely set of mustache chip clips.

Also, as a fun note about chip clips, Target uses very similar looking clips to the standard non-mustache chip clip with magnets on them to label carts and tubs in the back room (such as pull to work to the floor, backstock, items for price change (ie-unlabeled clearance) etc.), and I have heard that they work quite well re-purposed as actual chip clips.

You borrow the pens and paperclips from come companies, and from others it's the label clips.

This last item (for now... remember, I said there would be three from this photoshoot) is another kitchen timer that I actually think is REALLY cute. Normally I'm not much for owls or gigantic eyes or gimmicky overpriced appliances, but these are just adorable. And, after I thought up the great idea of how I could use the Matryoshka timers for my kids, these just might be almost worth getting for that purpose even!

Or so I keep telling myself, since I'm really growing quite fond of that adorable looking little owl and think he really might need to become a permanent feature in my future-kitchen. I'll probably never actually use him to time anything, but instead end up holding involved conversations about the inner meanings of life while scrubbing pans and other similarly unsavory tasks.

6 comments:

  1. Really? Target has the Salt & Pants set? I saw it on perpetualkid.com and wanted them forever - now I'll just stop on the way home and not have to pay shipping!

    Actually, a lot of this stuff I saw on that site. Guess I should stop in there more often!

    I love the balloon critter lamp.

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  2. The balloon animal lamp head is so random it is making me all persnickety. It's so random. And ugly.

    But the brain ice cubes? I. Want. Those.

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  3. We bought Salt and Pants at the same time that we bought the wands!! Thanks for airing all of my purchases!

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  4. hi there. random question: do you know if they still have those lamps at your local Target? If so, I have a proposition for you! please email me at roganista@gmail.com. I promise i'm not a weirdo - just a mom wanting this lamp for her kid's room.

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  5. I think the lamp is a play on Jeff Koons.

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