Sunday, July 1, 2012

Parenting Influence: Zombies

While I was giving the girls their evening bath tonight, Kristina asked me what bazombies are.

I'm assuming she heard someone saying "the zombies" and simply misunderstood the pronunciation. But in addition to the clear need to fix that detail, I also have to decide how best to educate her on zombies now.

At the time I attempted to explain to her that they're the living dead, and did my best bathroom zombie walk impression for the children while saying "braaaaaaains" in what was far more comedy than serious zombie analysis.

But what can I say, I haven't made much of a study of zombies (much less perfected the zombie imitation technique), and the bathroom was rather cramped for a true undead stagger. Also, "dead" is still a bit of a difficult concept for her, making it "undead" doesn't exactly simplify things.

(For the record, I'm very sorry if we go to your funeral and she turns to me and asks far to loudly "I don't want _____ to be dead dead, can they be a zombie now??" and you really should find the sentiment touching!)

Then Kristina asked me what the bazombies looked like.

I told her I'd show her pictures on the computer later.

But which pictures do I show her??

I want to make sure her zombie education is reasonably accurate and true, while still not being overly scary to the easily scared little 4 year old she is.

If I'm going to be teaching her these thing, I gotta teach them right!

[See also: How my child became THAT child telling the other kids THAT stuff]

However, I think I may have a plan, and it has to do with smelly socks.

See, she finds the idea of smelly socks and stinky feet HILARIOUS, which means she has that wonderful predisposition to slightly off color humor somewhere down inside of that cute little blond head (I just don't know whether I should take personal credit or blame her father for it). That means I just need to channel it in such away that large crowds of partially decomposed brain eaters chasing you is funny.

So, all you zombie fans out there, how do I do this? I'm not much of a zombie girl myself, finding the whole premise slightly distasteful (although whether I dislike them or vampires more is still up for debate), and therefore do not have a nice stock of not-too-gory zombie pictures and movie clips to pull out for answering my child's bazombied inquire. 



  2. Zombies are normal things that children talk about these days. Maybe it is because of the Plants Vs Zombies game in computers. Typically normal.