Monday, August 20, 2012

Inspirational Survey

I have been really wanting to write something inspirational. You know, the sort of blog post that is so inspiring and universally applicable it will go viral and land me a publishing contract and an appearance on The Daily Show.

Or at least make me feel like my blog might be something kinda sorta cool in it's own right, and not just appealing to those who think I'm hilarious (hahahaha!) and/or like my children (my money's on this one, have you seen how ridiculously cute they can be?).

However, lacking any amazing inspiration, sleep, and a creative state of being you all just get this question to answer for today:

How would you like to me to blog for the next few weeks?

  • A) Whine about how much working at Target during hell week sucks. Be sure to throw in the stories of passive aggressive bosses throwing away your very important papers on purpose, being forced to eat salad, and how you were almost killed by a box of bananas.
  • B) Whine about how much everything else in life is busy and crazy and hard right now. Be sure to include the stories of cleaning poop out of the inside of your daughter's shoes, not sleeping because you're an idiot and try to have friends, and how prohibitively expensive and over-taxed houses are in Boulder County. 
  • C) Whine about how hard it is to be a blogger. Seriously, what sort of creative content mastermind do you think I am? All I got are poop stories half the time, and the other half is dedicated whining about the same stuff every other blogger whines about! Well, not the same stuff, as I'm sure all bloggers don't whine about their children coveting their precious My Little Pony collection, but still, it's just me whining. That is totally not going to make my blog super awesome. Crap, it's like blogging is actual work!
  • D) Post links, copy articles, and pirate pictures to the most random and plausibly amusing stuff I can find. I have no idea what these things will be. Stories of man-eating plants and pictures of small fuzzy animals sitting inside of footwear are strong contenders in the category. It's like the grab bag of Marty's stressed out mind on a reddit high. 

In conclusion, here is a picture of a pink tutu-ed and tiara-ed Darth Vader costume. All that's missing is a purple tutu-ed and fairywing-ed little sister Velociraptor standing next to it, and you would be seeing how my children will probably end up doing Halloween in another few years. Consider it a preview for the sort of randomness blogging option D) will bring you. Awesome, awesome randomness....


  1. Somehow I sense a "things that should/ not be inside of shoes" theme coming together here... ;)

  2. I am seriously considering making myself a pink tutu princess/Darth Vadar costume.