I think there should be a similar scale, but to cover the social no-no topic of "how are things going with your ex?" and similar probings.
You shouldn't need to give a long detailed ramble about your personal life, you should just able to say things are about a 3 this month and have it immediately understood by all, and subsequently be left alone from further questioning.
- You think your ex is just so awesome and love them to pieces in the appropriate-for-being-divorced sort of way and only what the absolute best for them in just everything. Also, your psychiatrist just upped your prescription of Zoloft and you've been popping Vicodin like candy since a root canal last Tuesday.
- You have come to calm collective center accepting the dissolution of you marriage and have found a new inner peace of acceptance. You have also been doing meditative yoga under the tree in your backyard for 3 hours a day and started regularly eating a lunch of dandelion leaves.
- Meh, you got your stuff worked out and at least have a mutually distant relationship established. It's not worth the energy to hate them, but you probably wouldn't cry if they got hit by a bus tomorrow either. Biggest goal now is not ending up in a horribly cliche and horribly awkward closed quarters situations, like trapped alone in an elevator together for 29 and a half hours.
- You're considering what would be needed to enter the witness protection program and be moved to another state so your ex would not know where you are, and therefore never be able to contact you. You walk around the house muttering that fucking bastard to yourself, while somewhat regretting not killing them when you had the chance.
- You are actively calling hit men to place a bounty on their head. Going to jail for the rest of your life would totally be worth it.
Side note: it is VERY hard to write anything remotely humorous about divorce after going through it (which is probably why there really isn't much of anything out there). However, I personally feel that being able to laugh about thing sometimes, even the really crummy stuff, is a powerful coping mechanism and stress relief. If you happen to be in a situation where reading this made things feel just a little tiny bit better for you, I would love to hear about it. Please feel free to leave a comment or shoot me an email. And take heart, no matter how shitty things are, a) they can totally get worse and b) this too shall pass.