Thursday, December 6, 2012

Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip

I wrote this for a writing challenge with a friend of mine. The premise was a 600 word children's story, but then there was a joke about it being about turnips, so I totally went and actually wrote mine about a turnip. I hope you enjoy. And just in case you care, it ended up being 671 words in it's first draft seen here.

It was a sunny afternoon as Celia Bubbles skipped down the sidewalk. She wasn’t a very good skipper, mind you, as she was a turnip and it is difficult for turnips to skip. Most turnips don’t ever get around to leaving the vegetable patch, preferring the company of rutabagas and kale to people. But Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip wasn’t like most turnips. You see, Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip wanted something that the vegetable patch couldn’t give her. She wanted to go on a grand adventure. And so, today, she had decided to go have herself a grand adventure. Getting out the vegetable patch proved a bit of a pickle for her, as she almost fell into the gardeners pickling jars being used for the poor cabbages in her attempts to detach herself from the soil. But after that slight mishap she managed to roll herself under the garden gate and set out at an awkward skipping past towards a grant adventure. However, that had been some time ago, as the near pickling happened nearly first thing that morning, and Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip was beginning to wonder where she might find herself a grand adventure, or if she had accidentally gone the wrong way. She started to plop her little turnip self down on the curb to ponder which direction a grand adventure would be, when the crew of the Fresh Salad Food Truck across the street happened to lay eyes upon the biggest and most delectable looking turnip they had ever seen.  Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip only managed to avoid becoming the dinner special by quickly rolling herself onto a passing wagon. The owner of the wagon, Little Rita Redding, hated eating vegetables and was absolutely terrified by the turnip appearing in her wagon, so she set off running full speed ahead. This was just excellent for Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip getting away from the Fresh Salad Food Truck crew, but wasn’t so good for poor Little Rita Redding who quickly became tired from eating so many gummy bears at lunch time. No sooner had Little Rita Redding stopped to catch her breath and rest her chubby little legs, than a vegan St. Bernard named Waffles caught scent of the most glorious turnip he had ever smelled sitting in the back of a little girl’s little red wagon now parked in front of his yard. He knew his vegan family would praise him as the best dog of all time were he to bring home such a delectable looking fresh turnip, and as he was always eager to please, he immediately bounded over the recycled tire fence to catch that perfect smelling turnip. Poor Little Rita Redding spent all of her time playing video games and thus had never played with a dog, and was even more terrified of the approaching Waffles than she had been of Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip. However, this time when she set off running again as fast as her poorly conditioned heart and lungs could stand she left her little red wagon behind, and Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip soon found herself covered in St. Bernard slobber as Waffles carried her back over the recycled tire fence surrounding his hard. Luckily, those recycled tires had holes in them just the perfect size for a larger than average turnip, and she was able to make a quick escape once Waffles was distracted by an invading Squirrel. Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip had never cared much for squirrels before now, but decided that perhaps she had been a bit harsh to judge them, as the Vegan St. Bernard seemed noticeably worse for her condition. After escaping from Waffles, Miss Celia Bubbles the Turnip decided she had had quite enough of looking for a grand adventure for one day, and started to skip her way back home to the vegetable patch just as the sun was starting to set. Another day, she told herself, and I will find myself a grand adventure.

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